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Creating New Holiday Memories: Making Traditions Enjoyable for Aging Loved Ones in Assisted Living or at Home

The holiday season brings families together for cherished traditions, festive meals, and joyful gatherings. For families with aging loved ones—whether in assisted living, memory care, or living at home—small adaptations can help everyone celebrate comfortably and meaningfully. Here are some practical ways to enjoy the season while considering the needs of loved ones with memory or cognitive impairments.

So how do we make traditions an enjoyable experience for everyone? Northbridge Vice President of Resident Engagement and Memory Care Services, Kelly McCarthy shares tips on making the holidays easy and enjoyable whether your loved one lives in a community, or at home.

Planning Holiday Visits for Loved Ones in Assisted Living

When Bringing Mom or Dad Out for the Holidays

If you plan to bring your loved one out of their assisted living or memory care community for a holiday gathering, a bit of preparation can make all the difference:

• Communicate Plans Early: Notify the community staff about your plans, including pick-up and drop-off times. This helps them prepare your loved one and may alleviate any anxiety.
• Consider the Timing: It’s best to wait until closer to the outing to tell your loved one, as they may find it difficult to keep track of time and feel anxious about the upcoming event. Instead, let them know on the day, keeping it a pleasant surprise.
• Prepare Your Space: If you’re hosting at home, minimize clutter, ensure rooms are well-lit, and create a calm environment that feels welcoming and safe.

If Visiting Your Loved One in Their Assisted Living Community

• Choose a Good Time: Coordinate with staff to find a time that aligns with your loved one’s daily routine, ensuring they are in the best spirits for a visit. Mornings or early afternoons are often good times.
• Enjoy Familiar Activities: Holidays are ideal for reminiscing. Talk about past traditions, hold hands, play soft holiday music, and enjoy quiet, meaningful moments.
• Avoid Difficult Questions: Refrain from questions like, “Do you remember…?” which may create stress if they can’t recall details. Instead, share your own memories, which can feel comforting and inclusive.

Planning for a Loved One Living at Home

If your loved one lives with you or nearby, consider these tips to make holiday celebrations joyful and comfortable:

• Stick to Their Routine: Holidays can disrupt daily schedules, which can be stressful for seniors with cognitive challenges. Try to keep mealtimes, bedtimes, and quiet periods as close to routine as possible.
• Prepare a Familiar Environment: Keep holiday decorations simple and avoid too many blinking lights or loud music, which can be overwhelming. Familiar items like cozy blankets, family photos, and familiar scents like cinnamon or pine can bring comfort.
• Limit Distractions: Hosting the gathering at home? Keep gatherings small and avoid high-energy activities, which can create sensory overload. An intimate setting will make it easier for your loved one to enjoy the visit.

Tips for All Holiday Gatherings with Aging Loved Ones

• Focus on Smaller Gatherings: For both in-home and assisted living visits, smaller gatherings with fewer people are ideal. Spread out visits over several weeks, allowing for meaningful one-on-one time while reducing stress.
• Introduce Guests: Even if family members are familiar, a brief introduction can help ease any anxiety or confusion, especially if faces or names are hard to recall.
• Prepare for a Successful Visit: Let family members know how to interact with your loved one positively, including what topics are enjoyable, the types of questions to avoid, and how to be patient with pauses or changes in conversation.

Creating Adapted Holiday Traditions

Creating new or adapted holiday traditions can be a beautiful way to celebrate the season while honoring your loved one’s current needs:

• Holiday Baking Together: Baking cookies or holiday treats is a simple tradition that brings warmth and enjoyment. Familiar scents and tastes can evoke happy memories and provide a sense of continuity. Learn more about the benefits of cooking with your loved one with our Cooking up Memories signature program!
• Downsize as Needed: If you notice that larger gatherings create anxiety, consider a series of small gatherings throughout the holiday season. This approach allows for less stimulation while preserving family connections.
• Share Memories Through Photos: If a large in-person gathering isn’t feasible, bring along a photo album to share past holiday memories. It’s a simple way to reminisce without the pressure of a big gathering.

Remember, It’s About the Journey

Celebrating the holidays with aging loved ones, whether in an assisted living community or at home, is about creating a warm, supportive environment that helps them feel safe and loved. Let go of perfection, focus on the moments of connection, and adapt as needed. A slightly altered tradition can still carry the same joy and warmth, whether it’s baking, listening to holiday music, or sharing family stories.

At Northbridge, we’re here to help families make the holiday season special for everyone. Adapting traditions to fit your loved one’s needs can make this time of year truly meaningful. We wish you a season filled with comfort, love, and memorable moments that celebrate the past and the present in equal measure.

Please contact us if we can provide further information or if you would like to schedule a personalized tour.